I love the New York Times‘ David Gonzalez for his over-the-top use of metaphorical language — my first notice was in an article about the tenants of 64 Troutman (note the MLK ref), and now we’re really treated to a doozy today in an article about 208 Evergreen. A long intro marries a child’s geometry homework and the shapes reminiscent in the terrible conditions in which the residents of the building live.

I also am impressed with his access to Monsignor John Powis, the man behind (in various capacities) Make the Road NY, St. Barbara’s church, and the Orwellian named Bushwick Housing Independence Project. I enjoy Powis’ quotes, especially the more juvenile ones like, “the landlords come in and just want to make money” — which is apparently a shock to this man of God. Does he mean to tell us that people don’t put hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars into purchasing property with the sole purpose of providing comfortable and inexpensive housing to strangers out of the kindness of their own hearts? Say it ain’t so, Monsignor.

Here’s some basic econ that I cannot repeat enough: the larger the gap between market and regulated rents, the more monumental the dirtbag who would even be interested in buying a regulated property. You can pass any law you want, landlords will find a way around it — and it will more often than not produce hideous unintended consequences for everyone involved. That’s when you end up with disasters like children breathing toxic black mold in the key developmental years of their lives.

The article ends with a shocking statement from Powis:

“My worry is the city’s going to put a vacate order on the building. That would just be playing into the hands of the landlords.”

Is Powis more concerned with getting his ideological kicks, or the wellbeing of the families mired in these putrifying apartments? If these places are as bad as they sound, shouldn’t the tenants find alternative housing as soon as possible? No, that would “worry” Powis because it would be harder for him to stick it to the Man. Maybe he prefers the days when his Catholic Church was the Man.