Soon to invade a garden near me.

I need thyme for the cracks in my now-finished backyard patio, and since S & S Farm Market on Knickerbocker is a hell of a lot closer than Home Depot, I figured I’d give them a try. They did have plenty of nice plants, but I didn’t see any thyme. Since I needed mint, too, I grabbed three of their nice-looking specimens and went to the counter.

“Do you have any thyme plants?”

The Chinese woman behind the counter just stared, perplexed.

Then I thought to ask in Spanish: “Tomillo?”

“Oh, no we don’t have right now.”

I thanked her, paid, and walked out thinking “what the hell just happened here?”

Side note: I know even obscure herb names in Spanish because as a kid in Miami we used Badia brand spices, and they all had the name in English and Spanish on the bottle. I still have three Badia bottles left…even though I moved away from Miami almost 5 years ago. Should, uh, probably get rid of these. *cough*